by Frank O'Brien
Catholic Concerns Weekly

DAVISON, MI - What began as a call to renew faith at a local parish mission ended in the utter outrage and disillusionment of many. Just a few weeks into Lent and the most forbidden "A -word" - Alleluia -- was proclaimed by hundreds as they sang a popular hymn.

"I was shocked and appalled," said Ned Ladersmen, a member of St. Mary's in the Woods for 27 years. "What disturbed me even more was that I heard my wife utter the word. After 25 years of marriage you think you know someone, but I guess you really don't."

The word in question, "Alleluia" means "Christ is Risen" and it should not be said in Church during the penitential season of Lent. Due to its meaning, the word is joyously reserved for Easter.

Apparently the music director at St. Mary's of the Woods, Kevin Renaldo, forgot that the hymn "Sing a New Song" contained the word "Alleluia" when he was planning for the parish mission. Though Renaldo could not be reached for comment, St. Mary's in Woods has issued a statement saying that there was no intent to violate Church rules.

Others would say differently. One such group, Frankly Unwilling to Negotiate (FUN), has launched a full-scale investigation.

"Our liturgical experts will get to the bottom of this," said President of FUN Amy Bullis. "We are positive this was an attempt by the liberals to diminish the solemn season of Lent."

Steve Rzemkovich, Vice President of FUN, agrees. "Next thing you know they'll be trying to take away Stations of the Cross, fasting, and abstinence," he said.

FUN says it has seen a recent trend away from giving up things for Lent, with many people opting instead to do more. However, Bullis and Rzemkovich agree that they never suspected that all other Lenten traditions would so quickly be abused.

"There is no excuse for this," said Bullis. "Once that first 'alle-' well I mean that first 'a-word' was uttered, the song should have been stopped. Instead it went on for four more verses! I can only imagine how the Blessed Mother felt."

Some of the parishioners who realized the ungracious insult tried to remedy the situation. "I was reading the lyrics and I looked down and saw the 'A'-word coming up," said Melissa Brown, a member of FUN's teen group, "What Jesus Wouldn't Do". "So instead, I hurried up and substituted 'Glory and Praise to you Lord Jesus Christ' for the 'A'-word. It didn't fit the melody, but at least I know I did the right thing."

Some, however, were not as conscientious. St. Mary's of the Woods' radical DRE, Ruddy Loudon, claimed not to care that he said the "A-word" during the Lenten season.

"What's a season to God?" Loudon said. "I really don't see what the difference is between saying 'glory and praise to you Lord Jesus Christ' and just saying 'Alleluia.' It's the same sentiment."

With staff members like Loudon on board at St. Mary's of the Woods, further investigation will surely be needed. In the meantime, Parish members at St. Mary's in the Woods plan to have FUN at every Mass to ensure that the season stays as it should.